prayer

I miss you. 

The innocence bubble popped when my dad died. He was never coming home again. I was eleven years old. Then a new, different normal began. 

I remember realizing when in college, I had lived half my life with my father on earth and half with him in heaven. Correspondence with my grandmother gave me insight into my dad. She couldn't get him to do a thing. It wasn't until LOVE came to him, in the form of my mother, did she see him DO the things she could never motivate him to do. LOVE is a force. GOD IS LOVE.

In Ashley’s Harvest Moon Café on a Wednesday morn, it happens to be St. Patrick’s Day, 2021. Drip coffee, refillable for free, and a coconut chocolate chip muffin warmed just right, starts my time of labor here instead of at home. I don’t thrive being alone.

I observe. People watching, one of my favorite pastimes, has desperately been denied. A plethora of people right before my eyes!

There’s a man with a cap that speaks of a sailor past; his silver crown hides his story. In the soft chair he reads for a few hours and leaves; I’ve not seen a soul speak with him.

A Prayer for First Responders

I praise You, Most Great God, high above all other gods. I praise You that You are Sovereignly on Your Throne. In your Omniscience, Omnipresence, and Omnipotence You faithfully watch over these First Responders in every situation.

Tomorrow is the National Day of Prayer, 2021. Boy am I glad our nation has one.

Today I spent some time praying and weeding in the backyard.

Bamboo shoots were starting to pop up! 

Bermuda grass in the "woodchip areas" is bad enough, but now bamboo?! Have I sown the wind and am now reaping the whirlwind?

The Bamboo tops pull off real easy, but the roots remain.

I have before me some serious digging to get this "invasive" plant under control.

"Nip it Andy, Nip it in the bud!" great words from Barney Fife. 

The wonderful thing about Scripture is every time we read it, we can see something new. We will never get to the end of it, for it is a living book.

In reading Mark 14 this morning I noticed someone, a certain young man.  The passage that I want to highlight is verses 50-52. The scene is Jesus' betrayal in the garden of Gesthemene where Judas has betrayed him with a kiss. The guards have taken Jesus and all who followed him forsook him and fled. 

I remember.

I remember the lights.

Red,

Rotating,

Shining through the lowered window shade

At night.

No siren.

I heard

Through the wall

My top bunk

His queen-sized headboard

Separated only by the wall.

I remember his breathing,

A repetitive pain,

In sync

With the rhythm

Of his heartbeat.

His breathing shallow.

I remember his sound

An enduring-through-suffering expression.

No complaint.

No “why me?”

No words.

I used to do nice things to get affirmation, but that drained others because they didn’t have supply to give. We can’t get water from a leaky sieve. The world uses the term narcissistic, covert and overt; but God’s term is selfishness. We each go our own way. 

God taught me He’s the Source of my needs; To Him, I must turn; He’ll supply everything for me. Only from Him will I get all I biblically need, then I’ll have supply to minister to others He’s called me to meet.

In Ashley’s Harvest Moon Café on a Wednesday morn, it happens to be St. Patrick’s Day, 2021. Drip coffee, refillable for free, and a coconut chocolate chip muffin warmed just right, starts my time of labor here instead of at home. I don’t thrive being alone.

I observe. People watching, one of my favorite pastimes, has drastically been denied. A plethora of people right before my eyes!

There’s a man with a cap that speaks of a sailor's past; his silver crown hides his story. In the soft chair he reads for a few hours and leaves. I’ve not seen a soul speak with him.

We heard the sound of spiritual thunder. We didn’t know it at the time.

It was a sound I’d never heard before, the other two women didn’t recognize it either but we all heard it. It stopped our conversation, turned our attention, and caused us to peer out the window. One asks aloud the question, “What was that?” In the moment none of us had an answer. A flippant answer flashed through my mind like an inappropriate joke. Thankfully Wisdom’s been teaching me to keep my mouth shut.